People sometimes treat marriage like it’s the ultimate commitment while treating having children together like a less permanent step.
But it’s actually the opposite. A marriage can end. You can divorce, divide the property, sign the papers, and eventually move on with separate lives.
Parenthood doesn’t work that way.
When you have a child with someone, that person can be part of your life for decades—whether the romantic relationship survives or not. Birthdays. Graduations. School events. Medical decisions. Holidays. Weddings. Grandchildren. Emergencies.
You may break up with your boyfriend or girlfriend. You cannot break up with your child’s other parent.
And this isn’t an argument that everyone who has children should get married. Marriage isn’t right for everyone, and sometimes ending a relationship is absolutely necessary. The point is about how we think about commitment.
If someone says, “Marriage is too serious. I’m not ready for that kind of commitment,” but is perfectly comfortable intentionally creating a child with the same person, it’s worth asking: What commitment could possibly be more serious than choosing who will be the mother or father of your child?
Marriage makes someone your spouse. A child makes you family—whether you stay together or not.
Choose your co-parent with at least as much care as you would choose your spouse. Because relationships may be temporary.
Parenthood is permanent.
— Danni’s Den
What do you think: Have we made marriage seem like a bigger commitment than parenthood?
📚 Too Quick to Marry, Too Quick to Divorce: Lessons from a Divorce Lawyer — available on Amazon.
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